1 00:00:15,408 --> 00:00:16,568 Are you ready? 2 00:00:35,929 --> 00:00:39,410 Ms O'Riordan, this is a really serious offence. 3 00:00:39,410 --> 00:00:41,410 You understand this, yes? 4 00:00:41,410 --> 00:00:43,370 Yeah. 5 00:00:43,370 --> 00:00:46,450 - Has the victim made a statement? - Yes, sir. 6 00:00:46,450 --> 00:00:49,010 She says, "I knew Orla meant me no harm 7 00:00:49,010 --> 00:00:51,490 "and I beg you to go easy on her." 8 00:00:51,490 --> 00:00:53,410 Thank you. 9 00:00:53,410 --> 00:00:57,530 Ms O'Riordan, the tariff starts at 35 days, plus another 7 10 00:00:57,530 --> 00:00:59,971 because you physically took hold of the victim. 11 00:00:59,971 --> 00:01:03,211 But there are some mitigating factors. 12 00:01:03,211 --> 00:01:06,251 Your children going into care is one. 13 00:01:06,251 --> 00:01:08,051 Your good behaviour... 14 00:01:08,051 --> 00:01:11,291 - "Excellent," you said, Officer Martin? - Yes, sir. 15 00:01:11,291 --> 00:01:13,091 ...your excellent behaviour, 16 00:01:13,091 --> 00:01:16,011 and, of course, the fact that you pleaded guilty. 17 00:01:16,011 --> 00:01:20,051 Ms O'Riordan, you will serve an extra 20 days in prison. 18 00:01:23,852 --> 00:01:25,772 Thanks. 19 00:01:27,092 --> 00:01:28,572 Thank you. 20 00:01:49,893 --> 00:01:51,493 You're back, then? 21 00:01:57,653 --> 00:01:59,333 You delivered Kelsey's baby? 22 00:02:00,413 --> 00:02:02,093 Yeah. 23 00:02:02,093 --> 00:02:03,574 No officer, or...? 24 00:02:04,934 --> 00:02:09,174 No. They were all watching your little show, weren't they? 25 00:02:11,414 --> 00:02:12,654 I didn't know. 26 00:02:14,654 --> 00:02:15,854 I'm sorry. 27 00:02:33,975 --> 00:02:35,895 Oh, my God. 28 00:02:37,615 --> 00:02:40,175 Aw, wow! 29 00:02:41,415 --> 00:02:43,095 Look at him. 30 00:02:43,095 --> 00:02:44,935 He's perfect. 31 00:02:44,935 --> 00:02:46,496 Yeah, he is. 32 00:02:49,616 --> 00:02:51,296 Would you like to hold him? 33 00:02:51,296 --> 00:02:53,416 - Oh, no... - No, please, hold him. 34 00:02:53,416 --> 00:02:55,336 Please. I'd like you to. 35 00:02:56,656 --> 00:02:59,776 - Are you sure? - Yeah, I'd really like that. 36 00:02:59,776 --> 00:03:01,616 All right. 37 00:03:01,616 --> 00:03:03,056 There you go. 38 00:03:04,039 --> 00:03:05,616 - Shhh... - Ooh, shhh... 39 00:03:07,057 --> 00:03:09,297 - Aw! - It's OK... 40 00:03:09,297 --> 00:03:11,017 There you go. 41 00:03:12,097 --> 00:03:14,217 Oh, Kelsey. 42 00:03:14,217 --> 00:03:17,137 He's only little, but he's a right milk monster. 43 00:03:17,137 --> 00:03:19,817 - Are you feeding him yourself? - Yeah. I am, yeah. - Mm. 44 00:03:22,057 --> 00:03:23,537 What's his name? 45 00:03:26,537 --> 00:03:28,138 Daniel. 46 00:03:43,738 --> 00:03:46,418 - I can't... - It's OK, it's OK. 47 00:03:48,698 --> 00:03:50,419 There he is. 48 00:03:58,859 --> 00:04:00,539 You let me down, Adam. 49 00:04:00,539 --> 00:04:02,259 You got it anyway, babe. 50 00:04:02,259 --> 00:04:03,979 You got the mother and baby unit. 51 00:04:03,979 --> 00:04:07,779 Yeah, no thanks to you. You've let me down big time. 52 00:04:07,779 --> 00:04:09,859 Where is he now, babe? 53 00:04:09,859 --> 00:04:12,020 Where's the baby? 54 00:04:12,020 --> 00:04:13,140 He's asleep. 55 00:04:15,060 --> 00:04:16,860 Let me come and see him, Kels. 56 00:04:16,860 --> 00:04:18,380 Yeah? 57 00:04:18,380 --> 00:04:21,380 Let me come and see little baby Adam. 58 00:04:21,380 --> 00:04:23,300 It's Daniel. 59 00:04:25,380 --> 00:04:28,420 I thought you were going to name him Adam. 60 00:04:28,420 --> 00:04:29,820 After me. 61 00:04:29,820 --> 00:04:31,380 Well, I didn't. It's Daniel. 62 00:04:31,380 --> 00:04:33,421 And it's too late to change that now. 63 00:04:33,421 --> 00:04:35,421 That's OK, babe. Just... 64 00:04:36,981 --> 00:04:38,821 ...let me come and see little Daniel. 65 00:04:38,821 --> 00:04:40,901 I've got to go. 66 00:04:40,901 --> 00:04:42,981 No, look. Listen, Kels... 67 00:04:42,981 --> 00:04:44,621 - He's crying. - Babe... 68 00:04:51,061 --> 00:04:53,222 I think he's got a little bit of wind, 69 00:04:53,222 --> 00:04:55,102 his little legs keep lifting up. 70 00:04:55,102 --> 00:04:58,662 Oh, baba, come here. There you go. 71 00:05:00,182 --> 00:05:02,862 Is it wind hurting my baba? Is it? 72 00:05:02,862 --> 00:05:04,582 Is it wind? 73 00:05:04,582 --> 00:05:06,502 Come here. 74 00:05:08,422 --> 00:05:10,022 Sh. Sh. 75 00:05:18,183 --> 00:05:20,103 - Hi, Maeve. - Hi, miss. 76 00:05:20,103 --> 00:05:22,543 Do you mind if I close this? 77 00:05:22,543 --> 00:05:24,463 What's it about? Is it bad news? 78 00:05:24,463 --> 00:05:27,023 No. Well, nothing to do with your family or anyone, 79 00:05:27,023 --> 00:05:28,423 so do you mind? 80 00:05:28,423 --> 00:05:30,143 Right. Yeah. 81 00:05:30,143 --> 00:05:32,783 Lou's had a bit of good news. 82 00:05:32,783 --> 00:05:35,063 A card from her son, yeah. Great. 83 00:05:37,224 --> 00:05:39,704 - You two still close? - Yeah. 84 00:05:39,704 --> 00:05:41,584 Not had a fallout? 85 00:05:41,584 --> 00:05:43,024 No. Why? 86 00:05:44,704 --> 00:05:48,344 Maeve, her son didn't send that card. Someone else did. 87 00:05:50,144 --> 00:05:51,784 How do you know that? 88 00:05:51,784 --> 00:05:53,864 - I phoned him. - Right. 89 00:05:53,864 --> 00:05:56,465 And why are you telling ME this? What...? 90 00:05:56,465 --> 00:05:58,665 You think I sent it? 91 00:05:59,665 --> 00:06:01,585 I think someone you know sent it. 92 00:06:01,585 --> 00:06:03,185 Someone on the outside. 93 00:06:04,905 --> 00:06:07,105 Why would they do that? 94 00:06:07,105 --> 00:06:09,025 Because you asked them to. 95 00:06:14,745 --> 00:06:17,065 I only did it to see her face light up. 96 00:06:18,106 --> 00:06:19,826 I know. 97 00:06:19,826 --> 00:06:21,826 I know you didn't do it maliciously. 98 00:06:24,106 --> 00:06:26,266 So what are you going to do about it? 99 00:06:29,186 --> 00:06:30,746 I don't know. 100 00:06:40,227 --> 00:06:41,587 No Kyle? 101 00:06:41,587 --> 00:06:42,907 No. 102 00:06:44,147 --> 00:06:47,587 - Can I get you a drink? - No, I'm all right. Hey... 103 00:07:01,308 --> 00:07:03,028 - What...?! - I don't want it! 104 00:07:03,028 --> 00:07:04,828 - What? - Take it back. 105 00:07:04,828 --> 00:07:07,788 - Don't be so stupid. - You're the stupid one. - Sh! 106 00:07:07,788 --> 00:07:10,868 - What have I done? - You prick. - What have I done? 107 00:07:10,868 --> 00:07:12,828 You know I've packed it in. 108 00:07:12,828 --> 00:07:14,708 You're always saying that, Kelsey. 109 00:07:14,708 --> 00:07:16,188 No, I HAVE packed in this time. 110 00:07:16,188 --> 00:07:18,988 - You're going to have to come with us, Morgan. - Wha...? No, I didn't... 111 00:07:18,988 --> 00:07:21,349 - Listen, I... - Will you sit down and remain seated, please? 112 00:07:21,349 --> 00:07:23,869 - I didn't mean for any of this. It wasn't planned... - He's passed you something 113 00:07:23,869 --> 00:07:26,549 - and we need to see what it is. - It's something we used to do, but 114 00:07:26,549 --> 00:07:29,549 - he didn't know I didn't want to do it any more. - Move, please. Kelsey. 115 00:07:29,549 --> 00:07:31,389 Everyone knows I've packed it in! 116 00:07:31,389 --> 00:07:34,989 Ask anyone in this nick and they'll tell you that I've packed it in. 117 00:07:34,989 --> 00:07:38,349 But he didn't believe that, that's why he done this. It's not me. 118 00:07:38,349 --> 00:07:41,029 It's got nowt to do with me, it's him! 119 00:07:45,190 --> 00:07:47,310 In you go. 120 00:07:47,310 --> 00:07:49,110 They'll take the baby off her. 121 00:07:50,190 --> 00:07:51,430 Can they do that? 122 00:07:52,470 --> 00:07:54,030 Oh, yes. 123 00:07:54,030 --> 00:07:56,030 It wasn't my idea, honest. 124 00:07:56,030 --> 00:07:58,990 - Sit down. Take it out and show it to us, please. - It wasn't! 125 00:07:58,990 --> 00:08:01,870 I didn't know he was going to do it. If I did, I'd've done it properly. 126 00:08:01,870 --> 00:08:04,671 - Sit down. Take it out... - I would've swallowed it... 127 00:08:04,671 --> 00:08:07,351 - ...and show it to me, please. - You wouldn't have seen anything. 128 00:08:07,351 --> 00:08:09,071 Show it to me, please, Kelsey. 129 00:08:18,562 --> 00:08:19,911 Shhh. 130 00:08:25,232 --> 00:08:27,112 Could you take her through, please? 131 00:08:27,112 --> 00:08:29,992 What's going to happen? What's going to happen, miss? 132 00:08:43,712 --> 00:08:45,352 Shh... 133 00:09:00,473 --> 00:09:02,913 Erm, listen. I've been seeing someone. 134 00:09:04,753 --> 00:09:06,273 Right. 135 00:09:06,273 --> 00:09:07,794 Sahira. 136 00:09:10,994 --> 00:09:13,354 How long have you been together? 137 00:09:13,354 --> 00:09:15,154 About 18 months now. 138 00:09:16,994 --> 00:09:18,274 Serious, then? 139 00:09:19,994 --> 00:09:21,034 Yeah. 140 00:09:22,474 --> 00:09:24,594 What does she do? 141 00:09:24,594 --> 00:09:26,274 Uh, she's, um... 142 00:09:26,274 --> 00:09:28,915 - She's a nurse. Yeah. - Yes. 143 00:09:28,915 --> 00:09:31,115 - At your hospital. - Yes. 144 00:09:34,435 --> 00:09:35,915 Why are you smiling? 145 00:09:37,675 --> 00:09:39,115 - Just am. - Yeah. 146 00:09:39,115 --> 00:09:40,835 Well, she's pregnant. 147 00:09:44,235 --> 00:09:46,195 Yeah, so, um... 148 00:09:46,195 --> 00:09:48,555 I just... I need to ask you something. 149 00:09:50,716 --> 00:09:53,316 What was the biggest thing that I did wrong? 150 00:09:53,316 --> 00:09:54,836 Nothing. 151 00:09:54,836 --> 00:09:58,476 - Nothing, you're not to blame in any way... - I was. - ...whatsoever. 152 00:09:58,476 --> 00:10:01,716 And I... know that I did a lot of things wrong... 153 00:10:03,156 --> 00:10:06,436 ...but, um... wh-what was the biggest? 154 00:10:13,397 --> 00:10:16,437 The harder I found it, the more you looked away. 155 00:10:33,958 --> 00:10:35,678 Right, erm... 156 00:10:35,678 --> 00:10:38,518 Someone from children's services is coming 157 00:10:38,518 --> 00:10:42,358 - and they're going to take the baby for a while. - For a while? - Yeah. 158 00:10:42,358 --> 00:10:44,238 - Will I get him back? - Yeah. 159 00:10:44,238 --> 00:10:45,678 When? 160 00:10:47,198 --> 00:10:49,038 When will I get him back? 161 00:10:49,038 --> 00:10:50,638 I don't know. 162 00:10:50,638 --> 00:10:53,358 I'm never going to get him back, then, if you say it like that... 163 00:10:53,358 --> 00:10:55,519 - Don't start thinking that. - Well, when, then? 164 00:10:55,519 --> 00:10:58,439 You just keep doing what you're doing, keep your head straight, 165 00:10:58,439 --> 00:11:00,599 and you'll get him back, but today... 166 00:11:00,599 --> 00:11:03,439 - They're not getting him. - You put it in the baby's clothing. 167 00:11:03,439 --> 00:11:06,079 - Maybe if you hadn't have done that... - I panicked! Didn't I? 168 00:11:06,079 --> 00:11:07,919 Didn't know what I was doing! 169 00:11:08,919 --> 00:11:10,599 Should you feed him? 170 00:11:10,599 --> 00:11:13,799 No. Because he's not going nowhere. 171 00:11:13,799 --> 00:11:16,240 I know you love him. 172 00:11:16,240 --> 00:11:18,520 I love him more than anything. 173 00:11:18,520 --> 00:11:20,280 Then, hand him over, 174 00:11:20,280 --> 00:11:23,440 because if you resist, they're still going to have to take him... 175 00:11:23,440 --> 00:11:25,960 - They're not taking him. - ..and it might hurt him. 176 00:11:25,960 --> 00:11:28,160 - This is not the end. - They're not getting him! 177 00:11:28,160 --> 00:11:30,400 It might take a bit of time, but you can get him back. 178 00:11:30,400 --> 00:11:33,200 - They're not getting him! - It's definitely not the end... 179 00:11:33,200 --> 00:11:35,840 - They're not getting him. - ...honestly. - They're not getting him! 180 00:11:35,840 --> 00:11:38,561 - But the... first thing you've got to do... - They're not taking him! 181 00:11:38,561 --> 00:11:40,921 - ...is hand him over peacefully. - They're not getting him! 182 00:11:40,921 --> 00:11:43,121 Because if you resist, i-it could ruin your chances 183 00:11:43,121 --> 00:11:45,761 - of ever getting him back... - You like your job, do you? 184 00:11:45,761 --> 00:11:49,681 - Yeah. - But you like this most of all, don't you? 185 00:11:49,681 --> 00:11:52,201 Taking babies off mothers! 186 00:11:57,722 --> 00:11:59,202 You couldn't be more wrong. 187 00:12:09,882 --> 00:12:11,442 Why did you do it? 188 00:12:12,882 --> 00:12:14,882 I mean, there was your mother. Right? 189 00:12:16,762 --> 00:12:19,563 "I can't cope, Mum. Can you come and stay?" 190 00:12:20,723 --> 00:12:23,203 That's better than... 191 00:12:23,203 --> 00:12:25,203 Did you just not think of that? 192 00:12:25,203 --> 00:12:27,043 How far gone is she? 193 00:12:27,043 --> 00:12:30,403 Or the woman next door. You know, she's an experienced mother. 194 00:12:30,403 --> 00:12:34,243 All you had to do was say, "I need a little bit of help." 195 00:12:34,243 --> 00:12:37,643 But you... Did you just not think of that? 196 00:12:37,643 --> 00:12:39,403 Why did you do it? 197 00:12:41,884 --> 00:12:43,564 For fuck's sake, Abi. 198 00:12:45,364 --> 00:12:47,284 I mean, yeah, as bad as I was... 199 00:12:49,164 --> 00:12:50,644 ...why did you do it? 200 00:12:54,604 --> 00:12:55,884 I don't know. 201 00:12:57,764 --> 00:12:59,644 Yeah... 202 00:13:32,046 --> 00:13:33,446 Shall I take him? 203 00:13:50,527 --> 00:13:52,367 Can I? 204 00:14:09,248 --> 00:14:10,608 Come on. 205 00:15:44,652 --> 00:15:46,612 I'm sorry, Kels. 206 00:16:53,215 --> 00:16:55,216 Do you want your baby back, Kels? 207 00:16:56,736 --> 00:16:58,576 - Yeah. - Yeah? 208 00:17:01,136 --> 00:17:02,896 Then, keep off that stuff. 209 00:17:09,136 --> 00:17:10,696 Thanks. 210 00:17:28,057 --> 00:17:29,377 Hi. 211 00:17:30,977 --> 00:17:32,457 Come on in, Lou. 212 00:17:36,017 --> 00:17:37,618 Who's dead? 213 00:17:38,898 --> 00:17:39,978 No-one. 214 00:17:42,898 --> 00:17:44,738 What's all this, then? 215 00:17:59,339 --> 00:18:00,899 You sent that card? 216 00:18:02,339 --> 00:18:04,419 I'm so sorry. 217 00:18:05,699 --> 00:18:08,219 I'm so, so, so, so sorry. 218 00:18:12,339 --> 00:18:14,059 I didn't do it to hurt her. 219 00:18:16,259 --> 00:18:18,699 It wasn't a wind-up or anything like that. 220 00:18:35,060 --> 00:18:36,380 Hello? 221 00:18:36,380 --> 00:18:38,260 Hi, Kyle. 222 00:18:38,260 --> 00:18:39,500 Grandma's died. 223 00:18:44,581 --> 00:18:45,941 When? 224 00:18:45,941 --> 00:18:48,021 Really early... this morning. 225 00:18:49,101 --> 00:18:50,821 The hospice phoned. 226 00:18:52,461 --> 00:18:53,501 Right. 227 00:18:55,141 --> 00:18:57,341 - What did she want? Burial or...? - Crem. 228 00:18:58,661 --> 00:19:00,541 Definitely a crem. 229 00:19:00,541 --> 00:19:02,101 Will you come to it? 230 00:19:04,622 --> 00:19:06,142 I'll ask. 231 00:19:08,022 --> 00:19:09,942 But I might be in handcuffs. 232 00:19:09,942 --> 00:19:11,902 - Why? - Erm... 233 00:19:13,542 --> 00:19:15,462 Because I got into a bit of trouble. 234 00:19:18,862 --> 00:19:20,342 I'll see you, though. 235 00:19:21,502 --> 00:19:23,663 Won't I? I'll see you? 236 00:19:25,023 --> 00:19:26,063 I need to go. 237 00:19:40,583 --> 00:19:42,943 The family would like to pass on their thanks 238 00:19:42,943 --> 00:19:44,183 to the Willow Care Hospice 239 00:19:44,183 --> 00:19:47,944 who looked after Elizabeth and made her as comfortable as possible 240 00:19:47,944 --> 00:19:50,064 in her final months. 241 00:19:50,064 --> 00:19:54,704 Elizabeth had a lot of love for her four shining lights. 242 00:19:55,744 --> 00:19:57,424 Kyle, 243 00:19:57,424 --> 00:20:00,464 Callum, Nancy and Orla. 244 00:20:00,464 --> 00:20:03,424 And one of them, her daughter Orla, 245 00:20:03,424 --> 00:20:05,945 is now going to say a few of her own words. 246 00:20:12,665 --> 00:20:13,705 Thank you. 247 00:20:21,945 --> 00:20:23,545 Well, I'm not telling any secrets 248 00:20:23,545 --> 00:20:25,905 when I say me mam were fond of a drink. 249 00:20:27,145 --> 00:20:29,066 Hey, but we all make mistakes. 250 00:20:31,906 --> 00:20:33,626 She were an alcoholic. 251 00:20:35,226 --> 00:20:37,266 She'd been one all me life, me mam. 252 00:20:37,266 --> 00:20:38,786 She fought it, but... 253 00:20:39,946 --> 00:20:41,626 ...she very rarely won. 254 00:20:42,706 --> 00:20:44,746 But there were this one day... 255 00:20:46,106 --> 00:20:48,146 ...Kyle's first Holy Communion. 256 00:20:50,027 --> 00:20:53,747 We'd been to Mass and were coming back t'church hall 257 00:20:53,747 --> 00:20:56,227 and they opened the bar. 258 00:20:56,227 --> 00:20:58,547 And I weren't expecting that, and me mam weren't. 259 00:20:59,747 --> 00:21:02,107 And I thought, "If she touches one drop... 260 00:21:03,587 --> 00:21:05,867 "..I'm going and I'm taking Kyle wi' me." 261 00:21:07,027 --> 00:21:09,267 I mean, Kyle were having the time of his life, 262 00:21:09,267 --> 00:21:11,148 playing with kids his own age and 263 00:21:11,148 --> 00:21:13,308 getting money off adults. But sod it. 264 00:21:15,668 --> 00:21:17,468 He's coming wi' me. 265 00:21:20,188 --> 00:21:22,468 But she did not touch one drop. 266 00:21:24,468 --> 00:21:26,948 She probably battered it when she got home, 267 00:21:26,948 --> 00:21:28,748 but in that church hall... 268 00:21:30,068 --> 00:21:32,589 ...she stayed till t'bitter end 269 00:21:32,589 --> 00:21:35,029 and she did not touch one drop. 270 00:21:36,549 --> 00:21:38,469 She were my hero that day. 271 00:21:55,150 --> 00:21:57,670 - Nice to see you. - Well done, love. 272 00:21:57,670 --> 00:21:59,390 - So sad. - Thank you. 273 00:21:59,390 --> 00:22:00,990 - Bye, see you soon. - So sorry. 274 00:22:02,110 --> 00:22:03,430 Hiya. One minute. 275 00:22:04,870 --> 00:22:06,150 Please take 'em off. 276 00:22:07,310 --> 00:22:08,430 Please. 277 00:22:16,951 --> 00:22:18,311 Thank you. 278 00:22:18,311 --> 00:22:19,671 Hey, come here. 279 00:22:21,191 --> 00:22:23,111 Right, it's all right, yeah? 280 00:22:23,111 --> 00:22:27,671 It's going to be all right. I'm going to see you soon. OK? 281 00:22:27,671 --> 00:22:32,511 - I love you. - Love you. - Love you. 282 00:22:32,511 --> 00:22:34,511 OK? You tell your brother... 283 00:22:34,511 --> 00:22:37,672 You tell your brother that I love him, all right? 284 00:22:37,672 --> 00:22:39,192 I've got to go. 285 00:22:51,432 --> 00:22:52,672 Babe? 286 00:22:52,672 --> 00:22:54,392 Hiya. 287 00:22:54,392 --> 00:22:55,953 Kels, I'm sorry, babe. 288 00:22:58,273 --> 00:23:01,153 I'm really... really, really sorry, babe. 289 00:23:02,153 --> 00:23:03,753 Right. 290 00:23:05,913 --> 00:23:07,553 What are you going to do? 291 00:23:09,673 --> 00:23:11,673 I'm going to get him back. 292 00:23:11,673 --> 00:23:13,353 How, babe? 293 00:23:13,353 --> 00:23:15,313 I mean, that's good, yeah, 294 00:23:15,313 --> 00:23:17,314 but how are you going to do that? 295 00:23:17,314 --> 00:23:19,394 That's why I'm phoning. 296 00:23:19,394 --> 00:23:21,274 I'm going to tell the truth. 297 00:23:22,674 --> 00:23:25,354 If I'm going to get him back, I've got to get out of this place, 298 00:23:25,354 --> 00:23:28,434 - so I'm going to tell the truth. - And what is the truth? 299 00:23:28,434 --> 00:23:30,194 You know what the truth is, Adam. 300 00:23:32,474 --> 00:23:34,594 And who are you going to tell this to? 301 00:23:35,954 --> 00:23:37,794 The bizzies. 302 00:23:37,794 --> 00:23:39,315 What? 303 00:23:39,315 --> 00:23:41,275 The bizzies! 304 00:23:41,275 --> 00:23:42,955 So you're grassing on me? 305 00:23:42,955 --> 00:23:45,155 Uh... I'm telling the truth! 306 00:23:45,155 --> 00:23:46,875 Well, I'm telling you this, babe, 307 00:23:46,875 --> 00:23:48,875 if you go near those bizzies, 308 00:23:48,875 --> 00:23:53,355 if you even THINK about bubbling me to those bizzies, you're dead. 309 00:23:53,355 --> 00:23:55,835 You're dead and your baby's dead. 310 00:23:55,835 --> 00:23:58,355 Yeah, and don't think I won't be able to do it 311 00:23:58,355 --> 00:24:00,036 because I'll be banged up. 312 00:24:00,036 --> 00:24:02,596 Because I'll just slip someone in your nick a bit of brown, 313 00:24:02,596 --> 00:24:05,396 some slag a little bit of brown, and she'll do it for me. 314 00:24:06,876 --> 00:24:10,036 She'll cut you and your baby's throat. 315 00:24:27,357 --> 00:24:28,597 Send him down, Kels. 316 00:24:31,197 --> 00:24:33,037 Send him down. 317 00:24:49,398 --> 00:24:52,638 - All right? - Yeah, have you got a minute? - Yeah. 318 00:24:57,678 --> 00:25:00,078 Yeah, my son's coming to see me. 319 00:25:00,078 --> 00:25:02,198 I'm pleased for you, Lou. 320 00:25:02,198 --> 00:25:05,239 Yeah, it's not a visit. It's one of them... 321 00:25:06,279 --> 00:25:08,679 ...you know, restorative justice things. 322 00:25:08,679 --> 00:25:10,119 Right. 323 00:25:10,119 --> 00:25:11,519 So, uh... 324 00:25:11,519 --> 00:25:13,239 Yeah, I was wondering if... 325 00:25:14,999 --> 00:25:17,119 Would you come? 326 00:25:17,119 --> 00:25:18,279 Me? 327 00:25:18,279 --> 00:25:20,319 Well, I like you and... 328 00:25:21,999 --> 00:25:24,960 I thought you might be all right with it and... 329 00:25:24,960 --> 00:25:26,280 Go on. 330 00:25:29,000 --> 00:25:31,040 I'm an alcoholic. 331 00:25:35,480 --> 00:25:36,520 Right. 332 00:25:49,921 --> 00:25:51,441 Come in. Sit yourselves down. Yep. 333 00:25:54,361 --> 00:25:56,241 Um... 334 00:25:56,241 --> 00:26:00,081 OK, so I know everyone, so I'll do some intros. 335 00:26:00,081 --> 00:26:04,961 I'm Marie-Louise. I'm chaplain here. This is Prison Officer Carter. 336 00:26:04,961 --> 00:26:09,322 - This is Orla, who is here to support Lou, yes? - Yeah. 337 00:26:10,642 --> 00:26:13,842 This is Stephen. This is Lou's son, Stephen. 338 00:26:22,842 --> 00:26:24,762 I've always hated myself. 339 00:26:26,762 --> 00:26:28,363 That's where the booze came in. 340 00:26:30,323 --> 00:26:32,683 You can never forget you hate yourself, but... 341 00:26:34,083 --> 00:26:36,283 ...getting pissed helps a bit. 342 00:26:36,283 --> 00:26:38,643 Trouble is, the more pissed you get, 343 00:26:38,643 --> 00:26:40,723 the more you act like an idiot 344 00:26:40,723 --> 00:26:42,923 and the more you hate yourself the next day. 345 00:26:46,083 --> 00:26:47,243 So, uh... 346 00:26:49,804 --> 00:26:51,764 Yeah, I started to be other people. 347 00:26:53,524 --> 00:26:56,124 Anybody. Anybody apart from me. 348 00:26:57,364 --> 00:27:01,684 And I told myself, I wisnae drinking because I hated myself, 349 00:27:01,684 --> 00:27:04,044 I was drinking because I was rock and roll. 350 00:27:05,644 --> 00:27:06,964 A bit wild. 351 00:27:10,725 --> 00:27:13,885 And that's what I was on the day I punched Anna. 352 00:27:13,885 --> 00:27:15,565 I was... 353 00:27:15,565 --> 00:27:18,845 I was just rabbiting on and she came up to me and said... 354 00:27:20,125 --> 00:27:22,165 ..."Why are you behaving like this?" 355 00:27:26,765 --> 00:27:29,285 It was... so simple. 356 00:27:30,765 --> 00:27:32,406 So clear. 357 00:27:36,366 --> 00:27:39,726 And so impossible for me to answer so I punched her. 358 00:27:42,086 --> 00:27:43,926 And she went down. 359 00:27:46,086 --> 00:27:47,126 And... 360 00:27:49,526 --> 00:27:51,966 I had to pretend that I didn't regret it 361 00:27:51,966 --> 00:27:53,687 in any way whatsoever because... 362 00:27:55,207 --> 00:27:57,807 ...because I was rock and roll. I was wild. 363 00:28:02,527 --> 00:28:05,367 But all I wanted to do was pick her up and say, "I'm sorry. 364 00:28:07,047 --> 00:28:09,767 "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry." 365 00:28:15,208 --> 00:28:16,528 But... I didn't. 366 00:28:18,888 --> 00:28:21,928 And that was the last time I ever touched a drink. 367 00:28:21,928 --> 00:28:24,048 I mean, this is a prison, yeah, 368 00:28:24,048 --> 00:28:25,968 but there's booze... 369 00:28:25,968 --> 00:28:28,808 There's even more drugs, but I've never touched a thing. 370 00:28:33,088 --> 00:28:35,568 Deep down, I always wanted to talk to you about it. 371 00:28:37,169 --> 00:28:39,969 But I thought if I did that, I would be betraying Anna. 372 00:28:43,329 --> 00:28:45,249 But it was Anna who told me to come. 373 00:28:47,329 --> 00:28:52,129 She's not up to seeing you yet, but she wanted me to come and... 374 00:28:53,889 --> 00:28:57,050 ...I'd like to come again, if that's OK, because... 375 00:28:58,490 --> 00:29:00,170 Well... 376 00:29:00,170 --> 00:29:02,610 It's been nice to finally meet you, Mum. 377 00:29:05,650 --> 00:29:07,610 I'd love that. 378 00:29:12,210 --> 00:29:13,610 Thank you. 379 00:29:20,371 --> 00:29:23,571 I can't get this one tight like I did the other one. 380 00:29:23,571 --> 00:29:24,931 It's so annoying. 381 00:29:24,931 --> 00:29:28,011 - I don't even know why you need that string. - I just make it up, I do. 382 00:29:28,011 --> 00:29:30,851 - Hey, check this out... - Eh? - Look at this... 383 00:29:30,851 --> 00:29:32,731 Have you seen that wizard thing...? 384 00:29:36,771 --> 00:29:38,291 Maeve? 385 00:29:59,812 --> 00:30:01,453 I'm sorry. 386 00:30:22,854 --> 00:30:25,054 Calling on the case of the Crown 387 00:30:25,054 --> 00:30:28,294 versus Adam Muller and Kelsey Morgan. 388 00:30:28,294 --> 00:30:31,694 Mr Muller stands accused of the importation of drugs, 389 00:30:31,694 --> 00:30:35,374 supplying class-A drugs into prison, and threats to kill. 390 00:30:35,374 --> 00:30:38,814 Miss Morgan stands accused of the importation of drugs 391 00:30:38,814 --> 00:30:42,094 into the country, and smuggling drugs into Carlingford Prison, 392 00:30:42,094 --> 00:30:44,455 where she's currently on remand. 393 00:30:45,455 --> 00:30:48,775 Your Honour, my client, following her plea, 394 00:30:48,775 --> 00:30:51,735 would like to give evidence for the prosecution. 395 00:30:51,735 --> 00:30:53,215 Very well. 396 00:30:55,015 --> 00:30:57,655 I call Kelsey Morgan to the stand. 397 00:31:02,055 --> 00:31:05,136 Well, I'm telling you this, if you go near those bizzies, 398 00:31:05,136 --> 00:31:09,656 if you even THINK about bubbling me to those bizzies, you're dead. 399 00:31:09,656 --> 00:31:12,736 Because I'll just slip someone in your nick a bit of brown 400 00:31:12,736 --> 00:31:16,376 and she'll cut you and your baby's throat. 401 00:31:22,176 --> 00:31:26,817 I was a heroin addict. I was trying to come off it. 402 00:31:26,817 --> 00:31:29,697 And my mate and her fella were going to Spain, 403 00:31:29,697 --> 00:31:33,577 and they wanted to get me away from Adam and from where I was living. 404 00:31:33,577 --> 00:31:35,377 It was all drugs. 405 00:31:35,377 --> 00:31:39,537 Um, so they took me with them. And it was great for a bit. 406 00:31:39,537 --> 00:31:42,817 I was rattling but I was doing OK. 407 00:31:42,817 --> 00:31:44,977 Then Adam showed up. 408 00:31:44,977 --> 00:31:48,058 Told me I was stupid to be rattling in Spain. 409 00:31:48,058 --> 00:31:51,138 If I wanted to turkey, turkey back home, not here in Spain, 410 00:31:51,138 --> 00:31:53,738 cos Spain's for spoiling yourself. 411 00:31:53,738 --> 00:31:55,778 So I went back on it. 412 00:31:55,778 --> 00:31:58,618 And Me and Adam flew home together. 413 00:31:58,618 --> 00:32:01,298 They wouldn't let me through the green channel, 414 00:32:01,298 --> 00:32:06,698 they opened my bag and inside there was a package of heroin, a kilo. 415 00:32:06,698 --> 00:32:09,419 A kilo of heroin. 416 00:32:09,419 --> 00:32:12,779 And Adam was suddenly nowhere to be seen. 417 00:32:17,019 --> 00:32:19,219 He visited me on remand. 418 00:32:19,219 --> 00:32:21,339 And he told me that he loved me 419 00:32:21,339 --> 00:32:25,779 and that I was going down anyway so please don't take him down with me. 420 00:32:27,259 --> 00:32:30,260 Is Adam in this courtroom? 421 00:32:30,260 --> 00:32:31,860 Yeah. He's there. 422 00:32:33,300 --> 00:32:36,740 Did you see him put the package in your bag? 423 00:32:36,740 --> 00:32:38,540 Yes. 424 00:32:38,540 --> 00:32:40,860 Did you think it was drugs? 425 00:32:40,860 --> 00:32:42,300 Yeah. 426 00:32:43,700 --> 00:32:46,500 - Did you ask him if it was drugs? - Yes. 427 00:32:46,500 --> 00:32:49,300 He said no, it was a present for his mother. 428 00:32:49,300 --> 00:32:51,981 - You knew that was a lie. - Yeah, 429 00:32:51,981 --> 00:32:54,341 but I couldn't call him a liar, could I? 430 00:32:54,341 --> 00:32:57,461 I couldn't call him a liar, cos I was too scared to call him a liar. 431 00:33:03,021 --> 00:33:06,101 Miss Morgan, I can only imagine the distress 432 00:33:06,101 --> 00:33:10,301 that having your baby removed would have caused you. 433 00:33:10,301 --> 00:33:12,142 It is for this reason 434 00:33:12,142 --> 00:33:15,342 and the fact that you have assisted the prosecution 435 00:33:15,342 --> 00:33:17,542 and that you pleaded guilty 436 00:33:17,542 --> 00:33:21,902 that I sentence you to two-and-a-half years in prison. 437 00:33:21,902 --> 00:33:23,742 Taking into account the nine months 438 00:33:23,742 --> 00:33:26,222 that you've already spent on remand, 439 00:33:26,222 --> 00:33:29,302 which was longer than usual due to your pregnancy, 440 00:33:29,302 --> 00:33:34,063 you will serve a further six months before you will be released. 441 00:33:34,063 --> 00:33:35,743 Thank you. 442 00:33:38,103 --> 00:33:39,783 Mr Muller, 443 00:33:39,783 --> 00:33:43,743 the sentence I consider appropriate for the importation of drugs 444 00:33:43,743 --> 00:33:46,103 is one of ten years. 445 00:33:46,103 --> 00:33:50,343 For the supply of class-A drugs into prison - five years. 446 00:33:50,343 --> 00:33:54,063 And for threats to kill Miss Morgan - two years. 447 00:33:54,063 --> 00:33:56,744 You will serve these sentences concurrently, 448 00:33:56,744 --> 00:34:00,264 meaning a total of ten years' imprisonment. 449 00:34:03,504 --> 00:34:05,584 Can you go back to your mum's house? 450 00:34:05,584 --> 00:34:08,064 No, she rented it. Private landlord. 451 00:34:08,064 --> 00:34:10,184 - That's a problem, then. - Is it? 452 00:34:10,184 --> 00:34:12,104 Yeah. It's getting harder to find places 453 00:34:12,104 --> 00:34:13,544 for people leaving prison. 454 00:34:13,544 --> 00:34:17,385 We haven't got anywhere for you, Orla. All the hostels are full. 455 00:34:17,385 --> 00:34:20,625 Well... what do I do? 456 00:34:20,625 --> 00:34:23,865 - We can give you a tent. - What? 457 00:34:23,865 --> 00:34:25,265 A tent. 458 00:34:26,385 --> 00:34:29,385 You're thinking of sending me out of here wi' a tent? 459 00:34:29,385 --> 00:34:30,665 Yeah. 460 00:34:30,665 --> 00:34:32,985 - Is this a joke? - No. 461 00:34:34,745 --> 00:34:36,425 I'm sorry, Orla. 462 00:34:47,986 --> 00:34:51,506 Sending her out to live in a tent. It's an absolute disgrace. 463 00:34:52,906 --> 00:34:54,506 I know. 464 00:35:04,067 --> 00:35:05,227 Right, come here. 465 00:35:06,507 --> 00:35:08,827 - Bye, sweetheart. - Bye. 466 00:35:12,747 --> 00:35:14,827 Sorry for the things I said. 467 00:35:14,827 --> 00:35:16,907 It's all right. 468 00:35:18,787 --> 00:35:21,668 - Look after her. - Yeah. - And yourself. 469 00:35:22,828 --> 00:35:24,348 Take care, yeah? 470 00:36:43,391 --> 00:36:45,192 Hiya. 471 00:36:45,192 --> 00:36:47,512 Hiya, Mum. Are you out yet? 472 00:37:07,273 --> 00:37:08,553 Ta. 473 00:37:10,073 --> 00:37:11,473 Hiya. 474 00:37:11,473 --> 00:37:13,553 Hiya. 475 00:37:13,553 --> 00:37:16,073 Can I get you something? 476 00:37:16,073 --> 00:37:18,193 Er, tea, please. 477 00:37:18,193 --> 00:37:20,713 - Milk? - Yeah, please. 478 00:37:20,713 --> 00:37:26,073 I know this is proper cheeky, but could you get me some toast? 479 00:37:26,073 --> 00:37:28,514 - Toast. - Yeah. - Right. 480 00:37:28,514 --> 00:37:30,154 Ta. Thank you. 481 00:37:36,834 --> 00:37:38,994 - You OK, son? - Yeah. 482 00:37:38,994 --> 00:37:43,474 - Look, I'm going to say all this before she comes back, right? - Yeah. 483 00:37:43,474 --> 00:37:46,274 You know all that not-coming-to-see-me, Kyle? 484 00:37:48,235 --> 00:37:50,315 It's cos you were ashamed? 485 00:37:50,315 --> 00:37:51,795 Yeah. 486 00:37:53,475 --> 00:37:55,755 You were ashamed I were in prison. 487 00:37:57,075 --> 00:37:59,955 But you weren't ashamed of what I did. 488 00:37:59,955 --> 00:38:03,275 You were ashamed that I got caught doing it. 489 00:38:03,275 --> 00:38:04,835 Yeah. 490 00:38:06,835 --> 00:38:08,315 Me too. 491 00:38:09,516 --> 00:38:13,676 I am not ashamed of anything I have done for you, 492 00:38:13,676 --> 00:38:15,596 Callum or Nancy. 493 00:38:15,596 --> 00:38:20,196 But I won't do it again. I'll never do anything like this again. 494 00:38:20,196 --> 00:38:22,076 I'm going to get a job, 495 00:38:22,076 --> 00:38:24,156 I'm going to get us somewhere to live 496 00:38:24,156 --> 00:38:27,036 and I am going to get us all back together. 497 00:38:27,036 --> 00:38:29,876 I promise. Right? 498 00:38:29,876 --> 00:38:31,317 Right. 499 00:38:32,757 --> 00:38:34,437 But you have to help. 500 00:38:38,517 --> 00:38:39,957 Treat me like your mum. 501 00:38:43,837 --> 00:38:45,757 Let me come and see you. 502 00:38:45,757 --> 00:38:47,477 Phone me. 503 00:38:53,118 --> 00:38:55,118 Love me. 504 00:38:58,198 --> 00:38:59,838 - Yeah. - Yeah? 505 00:39:10,518 --> 00:39:12,198 I missed you. 506 00:39:12,198 --> 00:39:14,199 Missed you, too. 507 00:39:54,920 --> 00:39:56,281 Too spicy? 508 00:40:18,762 --> 00:40:20,242 You knew? 509 00:40:22,242 --> 00:40:25,042 Shit in my food and you didn't say anything? 510 00:40:42,443 --> 00:40:45,003 I was too scared to say anything. I'm really sorry. 511 00:41:31,685 --> 00:41:34,125 - I'm going to go get him. - You're not. 512 00:41:34,125 --> 00:41:36,085 I can't take any more of this. 513 00:41:36,085 --> 00:41:38,205 We agreed to try letting him cry. 514 00:41:38,205 --> 00:41:42,126 - No, we agreed to try it for a bit. This has been hours. - It hasn't. 515 00:41:42,126 --> 00:41:43,526 Oh, God. 516 00:41:46,006 --> 00:41:48,446 - That's pain. - It's not. 517 00:41:48,446 --> 00:41:51,406 - No, I'm going to go get him. - Right, well, if you bring him in here, 518 00:41:51,406 --> 00:41:53,286 I'm getting out of bed, I'm going downstairs 519 00:41:53,286 --> 00:41:54,886 and I'm leaving you to it. 520 00:41:56,206 --> 00:41:58,006 I'm sorry... 521 00:41:58,006 --> 00:41:59,886 I know... 522 00:42:06,607 --> 00:42:09,087 Naughty Mummy. I'm sorry. 523 00:42:27,088 --> 00:42:30,128 You won't believe this, but I'm not a violent person. 524 00:42:32,608 --> 00:42:35,648 But you attack me, I'll attack you. 525 00:42:37,168 --> 00:42:38,568 And I'm sick of it. 526 00:42:39,728 --> 00:42:43,208 So I'm going to tell you my story. 527 00:42:43,208 --> 00:42:46,649 I'm hoping you identify with bits of it 528 00:42:46,649 --> 00:42:50,689 and that's enough for you to leave me alone. 529 00:42:54,769 --> 00:42:56,249 So... 530 00:42:58,649 --> 00:43:00,969 How many of you have had kids? 531 00:43:05,049 --> 00:43:06,610 Most of you. 532 00:43:06,610 --> 00:43:08,090 Well... 533 00:43:12,050 --> 00:43:15,490 Uh, we were trying for ages, 534 00:43:15,490 --> 00:43:17,210 me and Rob... 535 00:43:18,810 --> 00:43:21,610 ...so when I got pregnant I was... 536 00:43:24,090 --> 00:43:25,690 ...ecstatic. 537 00:43:28,171 --> 00:43:32,491 Yeah, read all the books, listed all of the names and... 538 00:43:33,611 --> 00:43:35,331 ...made all the promises, you know, 539 00:43:35,331 --> 00:43:41,131 no bottle, no dummy, nothing sweet - all that stuff. 540 00:43:41,131 --> 00:43:45,091 And then... I went into labour. 541 00:43:48,371 --> 00:43:50,172 And it was horrific. 542 00:43:51,612 --> 00:43:53,492 Two days of agony. 543 00:43:55,212 --> 00:43:57,572 Then home with a crying baby. 544 00:43:57,572 --> 00:44:02,172 And I could barely sit down because of the pain. 545 00:44:04,572 --> 00:44:05,612 Uh, then... 546 00:44:07,252 --> 00:44:10,773 ...the nurse came and she stripped him and weighed him 547 00:44:10,773 --> 00:44:12,733 and said he was losing weight. 548 00:44:14,453 --> 00:44:18,693 And I said I wasn't finding it easy with the stitches 549 00:44:18,693 --> 00:44:21,093 and the worry and losing so much sleep, 550 00:44:21,093 --> 00:44:24,773 and she said that she was here for the baby and not me 551 00:44:24,773 --> 00:44:26,733 and that if he carried on losing weight 552 00:44:26,733 --> 00:44:30,933 he's going to go back into hospital, so I started to... cry 553 00:44:30,933 --> 00:44:35,294 and she started telling Rob about her holidays. 554 00:44:37,054 --> 00:44:38,614 I wanted to scream at her. 555 00:44:38,614 --> 00:44:41,254 It is my first child, you heartless bitch, 556 00:44:41,254 --> 00:44:43,134 I need a bit of help! 557 00:44:45,894 --> 00:44:47,534 I had no-one. 558 00:44:49,294 --> 00:44:51,334 We'd moved there for Rob's job. 559 00:44:51,334 --> 00:44:54,375 He knew people in work. I knew no-one. 560 00:44:56,415 --> 00:44:58,055 Just Rob and the baby. 561 00:45:07,255 --> 00:45:10,295 - What time will you be back? - About eight. 562 00:45:10,295 --> 00:45:13,095 - For God's sake, Rob. - We've got to have a debrief. - No. 563 00:45:13,095 --> 00:45:15,536 You have a debrief the next working day, 564 00:45:15,536 --> 00:45:17,216 you don't have a debrief in your own time. 565 00:45:17,216 --> 00:45:19,496 We have to have it in our own time cos we're snowed under. 566 00:45:19,496 --> 00:45:22,296 You're doing it after work because you don't want to be here 567 00:45:22,296 --> 00:45:24,256 - with the baby! - We're doing a debrief after work 568 00:45:24,256 --> 00:45:27,336 - because it's the only time we can do it. - It's not fair, Rob. 569 00:45:27,336 --> 00:45:30,736 If I go out, it's to get the shopping and I'm back at six at the latest. 570 00:45:30,736 --> 00:45:33,656 I spend time with the baby - with you AND the baby! 571 00:45:33,656 --> 00:45:37,657 - And you are home at half eight every time. - Listen, I've got to go. 572 00:45:46,577 --> 00:45:48,057 Fuck off. 573 00:45:52,017 --> 00:45:55,337 Shhh... Shhh. 574 00:45:55,337 --> 00:45:58,658 Shhh-shhh-shhh! 575 00:45:58,658 --> 00:46:03,138 Sh! Sh. 576 00:46:05,258 --> 00:46:06,458 Sh! 577 00:46:08,298 --> 00:46:11,658 One day I managed to get him to sleep, God knows how... 578 00:46:11,658 --> 00:46:13,618 and I put him in his cot. 579 00:46:15,058 --> 00:46:17,859 I walked out the room, 580 00:46:17,859 --> 00:46:19,579 but once out the room... 581 00:46:21,419 --> 00:46:23,699 ...I started thinking I'd harmed him. 582 00:46:25,299 --> 00:46:27,099 I'd killed him. 583 00:46:29,859 --> 00:46:32,299 I don't know why I thought that but I did. 584 00:46:33,859 --> 00:46:36,899 So I went back in and checked and he was fine. 585 00:46:38,419 --> 00:46:40,500 I walked out again. 586 00:46:40,500 --> 00:46:43,220 No sooner out the room then, again, I'm thinking I've harmed him, 587 00:46:43,220 --> 00:46:45,740 so I go back again and he's fine again. 588 00:46:47,220 --> 00:46:49,180 But this time I can't leave him there 589 00:46:49,180 --> 00:46:50,900 so I pick him up and I carry him. 590 00:46:51,940 --> 00:46:54,540 And carry him and I carry him. 591 00:46:54,540 --> 00:46:57,020 And it's only when Rob comes home 592 00:46:57,020 --> 00:46:58,940 that I can put him down 593 00:46:58,940 --> 00:47:00,861 and leave him there. 594 00:47:02,421 --> 00:47:04,061 I couldn't let him out my sight. 595 00:47:05,741 --> 00:47:08,501 So every minute of every day, 596 00:47:08,501 --> 00:47:10,901 I am looking at my child. 597 00:47:10,901 --> 00:47:14,741 Where other women are seeing THEIR baby crying... 598 00:47:17,141 --> 00:47:19,701 ...I'm looking at mine and he's twisting. 599 00:47:21,061 --> 00:47:22,902 He's twisting in pain. 600 00:47:22,902 --> 00:47:26,742 He'd fight even to get away from his dad. 601 00:47:26,742 --> 00:47:29,782 When he'd come back to me, crying. 602 00:47:29,782 --> 00:47:32,062 Still screaming. 603 00:47:34,062 --> 00:47:36,062 Nothing can make him stop. 604 00:47:38,102 --> 00:47:41,142 Yeah, Robert Cochrane. He's in theatre. 605 00:47:43,503 --> 00:47:46,063 Well, yeah, I know that, but when it is possible, 606 00:47:46,063 --> 00:47:48,823 could you ask him to phone me, please? 607 00:47:48,823 --> 00:47:51,223 I'm his wife. 608 00:47:51,223 --> 00:47:54,103 Sh-sh-sh-sh. 609 00:47:58,383 --> 00:48:00,343 This is Croft Park Medical Centre. 610 00:48:00,343 --> 00:48:03,864 Our receptionists are busy at the moment but you are... 611 00:48:03,864 --> 00:48:05,664 ...18th in the queue. 612 00:48:05,664 --> 00:48:07,003 Please feel free... 613 00:48:28,385 --> 00:48:30,745 I think I wanted to stop him crying. 614 00:48:32,585 --> 00:48:34,385 It's just... 615 00:48:36,585 --> 00:48:41,465 If you... stop him crying then you ease his pain. 616 00:48:43,945 --> 00:48:46,386 Just couldn't stop him crying. 617 00:49:17,347 --> 00:49:19,227 I held him under. 618 00:49:24,667 --> 00:49:26,787 I wanted peace and quiet. 619 00:49:29,468 --> 00:49:30,828 For him... 620 00:49:32,228 --> 00:49:33,668 ...and for me. 621 00:49:35,508 --> 00:49:37,508 No more suffering. 622 00:51:13,672 --> 00:51:15,113 What's wrong? 623 00:51:17,073 --> 00:51:18,233 What is it? 624 00:51:21,113 --> 00:51:22,513 You didn't ring. 625 00:51:25,273 --> 00:51:26,993 My God, you're wet. 626 00:51:28,073 --> 00:51:29,393 And cold. 627 00:51:31,193 --> 00:51:33,953 You're starting to scare me now, Abs. What's wrong? 628 00:51:33,953 --> 00:51:35,433 Where's the baby? 629 00:51:38,234 --> 00:51:39,994 Abi, where's the baby? 630 00:51:42,354 --> 00:51:44,154 In his cot. 631 00:52:37,436 --> 00:52:39,957 Have you told this story to anyone before? 632 00:52:42,877 --> 00:52:44,637 It wouldn't bring him back. 633 00:52:47,117 --> 00:52:50,317 No. But it... could've helped you. 634 00:52:53,437 --> 00:52:55,797 I was under pressure, yeah. 635 00:52:57,317 --> 00:52:58,797 But so... 636 00:53:01,678 --> 00:53:03,638 ...were so many other women. 637 00:53:06,798 --> 00:53:08,478 They coped. 638 00:53:08,478 --> 00:53:10,318 I didn't. 639 00:53:10,318 --> 00:53:15,078 I was... Yeah, I was ashamed, I was ashamed of that. 640 00:53:15,078 --> 00:53:16,838 Didn't want them to know that. 641 00:53:18,478 --> 00:53:21,118 So I told all about killing my baby. 642 00:53:23,639 --> 00:53:27,119 But I told no-one that I couldn't cope. 643 00:53:30,519 --> 00:53:32,199 Can I ask a question? 644 00:53:34,519 --> 00:53:35,719 Yeah. 645 00:53:38,799 --> 00:53:40,199 What was his name? 646 00:53:50,880 --> 00:53:52,560 Daniel. 647 00:53:59,640 --> 00:54:00,960 Daniel. 648 00:54:13,081 --> 00:54:14,761 One of them will go for me now. 649 00:54:15,841 --> 00:54:18,081 - Someone from the group? - Mm-hm. 650 00:54:18,081 --> 00:54:21,441 Yeah. I've shown a bit of vulnerability, you see. 651 00:54:21,441 --> 00:54:25,001 They'll think I'm not so tough, they can take me on and win. 652 00:54:25,001 --> 00:54:27,962 Other women have spoken and nothing's happened. 653 00:54:27,962 --> 00:54:29,722 They haven't murdered their kids. 654 00:54:31,522 --> 00:54:33,642 - Shall we sit? - If you want. 655 00:54:33,642 --> 00:54:35,482 Yes, I do. 656 00:54:42,882 --> 00:54:46,202 She cared for me all the way through my pregnancy. All the way. 657 00:54:46,202 --> 00:54:49,203 And she, like, delivered my... She delivered my little Daniel. 658 00:54:49,203 --> 00:54:51,563 She delivered your baby, that entitles her to murder her own - 659 00:54:51,563 --> 00:54:53,683 - that's what you're saying? - That's not what I'm saying. 660 00:54:53,683 --> 00:54:55,003 I'm saying she's done a bit of good. 661 00:54:55,003 --> 00:54:57,883 - She's done way more good than anyone else in here, including me. - Yeah. 662 00:54:57,883 --> 00:55:00,843 I mean, she could have walked away, she didn't have to help Kelsey. 663 00:55:00,843 --> 00:55:03,803 - She's a trained nurse. - I know, but she didn't have to help, did she? 664 00:55:03,803 --> 00:55:06,403 You can't deny that she's done something. 665 00:55:13,484 --> 00:55:15,804 What does that represent? 666 00:55:15,804 --> 00:55:18,404 What do you want it to represent? 667 00:55:19,804 --> 00:55:23,084 Is it my child, still alive, up in heaven? 668 00:55:24,084 --> 00:55:25,684 - Perhaps. - It's a candle. 669 00:55:27,084 --> 00:55:29,004 It's a bloody candle. 670 00:55:29,004 --> 00:55:32,925 - You want me to blow it out? - Do you want it lit? - Yes. 671 00:55:32,925 --> 00:55:35,845 It reminds me of the presence of Christ. 672 00:55:37,445 --> 00:55:38,845 Fine. 673 00:55:42,485 --> 00:55:44,845 I ask a lot of women this, do you mind? 674 00:55:47,365 --> 00:55:50,925 If I could grant you one wish, what would that be? 675 00:55:50,925 --> 00:55:53,726 I fear I'll say what they all say - 676 00:55:53,726 --> 00:55:55,246 can I go back in time, please? 677 00:55:56,646 --> 00:55:58,366 A lot say that, yes. 678 00:56:00,086 --> 00:56:04,006 So, if I could grant you another wish, what would that be? 679 00:56:06,726 --> 00:56:08,646 Has the bishop found you out yet? 680 00:56:09,806 --> 00:56:11,646 No. 681 00:56:11,646 --> 00:56:13,007 Good. 682 00:56:18,567 --> 00:56:23,247 So if I could grant you another wish, what would that be? 683 00:56:30,887 --> 00:56:33,087 I'd like to be able to grieve. 684 00:56:36,528 --> 00:56:39,128 But how do you grieve the death of a child 685 00:56:39,128 --> 00:56:41,288 when you're the one responsible for it? 686 00:56:42,568 --> 00:56:44,728 Can I pray for that? 687 00:56:46,968 --> 00:56:49,888 That God enables you to grieve for Daniel? 688 00:56:56,129 --> 00:56:57,169 Yes. 689 00:57:01,889 --> 00:57:05,169 OK, what if we'd done it? What if we killed our babies? 690 00:57:05,169 --> 00:57:08,409 - I wouldn't. - Yeah, but what if we had? We'd be wrecks. 691 00:57:08,409 --> 00:57:11,249 That woman is a wreck and she deserves a bit of compassion. 692 00:57:11,249 --> 00:57:12,849 She needs looking after, 693 00:57:12,849 --> 00:57:15,329 - not attacking. - I think we're all forgetting 694 00:57:15,329 --> 00:57:17,010 she couldn't kill herself. 695 00:57:17,010 --> 00:57:21,370 OK to kill a baby but not herself? No, that is a selfish bitch. 696 00:57:21,370 --> 00:57:24,170 That's not what I'm saying. Maeve, what do you think? 697 00:57:24,170 --> 00:57:27,370 What Abi said stuck with me when she said that we need to show the world 698 00:57:27,370 --> 00:57:30,370 that we couldn't possibly do what she did, so we attack, 699 00:57:30,370 --> 00:57:33,650 and the more we attack, the more we feel saintly. 700 00:57:33,650 --> 00:57:35,370 And that's fucking bullshit. 701 00:58:32,533 --> 00:58:34,733 My God, the telly's off. 702 00:58:38,413 --> 00:58:40,333 Yeah, we've been talking. 703 00:58:40,333 --> 00:58:41,854 - About me. - Yeah. 704 00:58:43,334 --> 00:58:46,174 Look, no-one here's going to do you any harm. 705 00:58:47,534 --> 00:58:50,854 OK, I'm not saying that everyone forgives you. They don't. But... 706 00:58:52,054 --> 00:58:53,734 ...we won't do you harm. 707 00:58:55,254 --> 00:58:57,254 I can't speak for the rest of the prison, 708 00:58:57,254 --> 00:58:59,854 they'll need putting straight, but everyone here right now, 709 00:58:59,854 --> 00:59:02,415 everyone in this unit, right? 710 00:59:02,415 --> 00:59:04,375 - Yeah. - Yeah. 711 00:59:05,415 --> 00:59:06,655 You're fine. 712 00:59:15,455 --> 00:59:17,575 What, including you? 713 00:59:18,975 --> 00:59:20,175 Yeah. 714 00:59:20,175 --> 00:59:21,855 Whatever. 715 00:59:21,855 --> 00:59:23,055 Yeah. 716 00:59:30,536 --> 00:59:32,056 Thank you. 717 00:59:36,176 --> 00:59:37,416 Thanks. 718 01:00:46,099 --> 01:00:48,019 Bye, then. 719 01:00:51,980 --> 01:00:53,460 Bye. 720 01:01:00,140 --> 01:01:02,620 No ta-ras, then. 721 01:01:02,620 --> 01:01:04,140 Looks like that. 722 01:01:05,860 --> 01:01:07,460 I'll come with you. 723 01:02:56,266 --> 01:02:57,826 - You OK? - Yeah. 724 01:03:28,187 --> 01:03:31,187 Mrs Kelly? I'm Fay Clarkson from Children and Families. 725 01:03:31,187 --> 01:03:35,227 - We spoke on the phone. - Hello. - This is Kelsey. - Hi. - Hi, Kelsey. 726 01:03:38,027 --> 01:03:40,108 Give Mummy a big hug, Daniel. 727 01:03:50,828 --> 01:03:53,028 He'll be yours again soon, my love. 728 01:03:53,028 --> 01:03:55,588 Just keep doing what you're doing. 729 01:03:55,588 --> 01:03:58,188 I will. I will, I will.